I was listening to an interview with Brianna Booth, who is a student of human sexuality. The interview was on a website called the Get Inspired! Project and it made me think about sexuality a bit. (like that topic is really far from my mind at any given time – right)
Spinning Wheels, got to go round.
She used an example of a color wheel, where different colors are very clearly defined and we know where blue fits in and where red fits in. Clear definitions of color, but there are no clear definitions of sexuality. But wait, the colors all gradually blend too, don’t they? I mean red isn’t in green much, but greens blend into blues which blend into purples which blend into red. So how does this fit with sexuality?
Uptight sexually conservatives may have a clear line on things in their minds. Sex is missionary style and for procreation. But why? Do they think, oh, ‘doggy style’ is close to bestiality, so it’s just wrong. That might lead to actually lust for dogs, right? No, obviously not.
So maybe it’s just pleasure. You know. And then just staying with a monogamous relationship, but you are free to explore pleasuring each other. Exploring more normal practices, maybe different positions, maybe, gasp, oral sex. Maybe ‘deviant’ exploration with tongues…hmm.
So maybe that gets into salad tossing. Yeah, a tongue lashing of the anus, if you’re not familiar with the salad term. So if I enjoy that occasionally where can that lead? It’s anal pleasure, and for a man that’s going to a dark place. (not in my mind, but to some)
I remember once my father was supposed to get a prostate exam and he said “I don’t want anyone fooling around back there.” Like the doctor was fooling around. So he wouldn’t get that done.
But for me that fooling around can be alright. We occasionally use devices in our sex life (current life with wife) and that’s fine with me. But in some people’s eyes that is probably bordering on homosexual behavior. But wait, it’s with my wife. that’s not gay. (not that there’s anything wrong with that)
But as I told my wife I occasionally have gay sort of fantasy thoughts. My thoughts are very generic and the men are so far removed from a real man it’s more like thoughts of extra-terrestrials than actual earthmen. These men are totally clean, well scented, and more like animatronics. God this description is really going wrong. These fantasy men just aren’t real. I’ve ‘experimented’ or is that “experiMENted” with real men back in the college days (isn’t that so cliche?) and it literally was a nauseating experience. (only two encounters and both were with me lightly buzzed, but then throwing up almost immediately upon actual contact) So fantasy, yes, reality not good.
But in my real sex life with my real sex wife, we explore and enjoy each other in many and various ways and I see nothing wrong with it. Still know this isn’t a topic I share openly because it just isn’t very well accepted and generally isn’t a common table topic. Maybe with the right crowd, but even then I kind of doubt it. Guess I’ll just share here..
